So we finally feel comfortable making it official! We are expecting a baby come September! We shared the news with Owen a week or so ago and he is pretty excited! We gave him a doll (which he first named Noodle Poodle, then changed it to Oliver) and a Berenstain Bears book about new babies. We asked him if he'd like to have a baby join our family and he thought we meant the doll. So I asked him if he had noticed my tummy getting bigger lately and he kindly said, "That's just because you ate too much food Mommy!" Once we explained that he was going to be a big brother, his eyes lit up and he was excited, but then he was off to feed Oliver.
Since then, he's had a few questions - how will they get the baby out, when I eat is the food going down to the baby, etc. He talks to the baby a lot now and shows it how quickly he can put his socks on, how he brushes his teeth, etc. He asked me if the baby would be able to play Legos with him and another time he said to the baby something about how it "is in a cave or a trap in there in Mommy's tummy."
He is so caring and loving, we just can't wait to see him become a big brother!
This pregnancy has been a lot different than my other two. With Owen, it was all so new and I was naïve to all that could happen. With Abby, I was stressed that I'd have an abruption and it didn't cross my mind that I could have a miscarriage. With this pregnancy, it took awhile for us to talk about anything baby without first saying, "If all goes well" or "If we get to bring a baby home." As with many women I know that have experienced loss, we have taken each day at a time and tried not to think too far ahead. My mantra has been, "Today I am pregnant, so it is a good day." I'd be lying if I said that there weren't days when my mind reminded me that I thought I was pregnant with Abby for much longer than I really was, so really the days we've seen the baby or heard the heartbeat are few of the days that I could really say my mantra with conviction. I know that must sound terrible to those who haven't experienced loss, but I think it's a defense mechanism to protect your heart.
My first trimester was filled with all-day sickness and migraines, but I am feeling SO, SO much better now, thank goodness! I have an amazing OB that has walked my journey with me (she was at the hospital when I had my abruption with Owen) and is so understanding of my fears and uncertainties. I am blessed to have her!
This is the first pregnancy that we've done genetic testing - partially because I am of "advanced maternal age" and partly because we lost Abby to Turner's Syndrome, which is a chromosomal defect. The testing is amazing and has come so far even since we had Owen. It used to be that there were so many false positives and people spent their entire pregnancies thinking their baby had chromosomal abnormalities. Now, if you qualify, they do a test were they take mom's blood and send it to Mayo. They find chips of baby's DNA and can tell with 99% accuracy if there are chromosomal defects! We received our results a few weeks back and everything looks great. We were so relieved!
If you pray, please keep us in your prayers and if not, please send positive energy our way! We could use a normal, boring pregnancy and birth this time around!!!
